Long Time Coming

I know its been barely hours since you guys gave me the keys to the golden gates of laosipkong and there will be laughter and bemusement over my haste in posting here, but I think it is a post long overdue.

All the recent reminiscing has been a strong reminder of how long we’ve all known each other, especially all the secondary school stuff brought up by Alvin and Kumar at Jalan Kayu some nights back, on our post-L4D jaunt. The amazing thing is the presence of elements of our personalities that have somehow persisted through time. Equally amazing is the centrality which our long friendship has played in my life, whether you guys were around or not. Our time together now is testimony to that.

Of course, I have disappeared for periods of time and missed out on lots of fun, (like Drogspa’s spa-cial) but it has been a poignant return for me, with all the time we’ve spent together recently and with Alvin off soon to pursue his future. I wish you the best and I hope that any bad experience you have had so far in life is only a counter-balance to all the good things that will now come your way. You will definitely be missed. (No more tandem biking/ kayak sharing/ shoe shopping/drag racing!)

Tonight was our record-setting 4 car convoy and yes, I drove like a maniac (sorry kumar and mendi!). I think its been a long time since I let myself off my leash and feel the adrenaline of running forward and not looking back. Its been a long time since I’ve hung out with GMH like this and I hope its not the last. I’m lucky to have all you guys as friends, honestly.

It hasn’t been a smooth ride for me lately, but GMH has been the base trend-line to my ups and downs, and the regression that must meet every digression. For months, I have been grappling with a well of sadness which I couldn't release and a deep-rooted aggression I could not control. Rest assured, I sought help and I hope the worst is now over. It is a strange time in my life that you guys have reappeared, in my moment of helplessness.

I will always remember that you guys were here for me for each for the times I’ve fallen and bruised myself. Especially Kumar, who had to listen to two rounds of my endless post-traumatic babbling and yet be able to offer some rationality and Alvin for the support, di siao and that talk on the drive back home. There are few people who understand me like you guys. Of course, not forgetting all the rest of you guys, with your di siao-ing and kip huip spotting. I know that in time, I will pick myself up again and regain that inner strength I had taken for granted.

This is my post for now, and I will hope to contribute more. Thanks guys, for the great times and the brother-hood!

Ang Heng